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WARDROBE MALFUNCTIONS

WARDROBE MALFUNCTIONS

You know those months like April where sometimes it snows but usually it doesn’t and then all of a sudden, kind of without warning, a blizzard swoops in and the weather people on the news act like they totally knew it was gonna happen even though their exact words over the last several days always involved expressions like “just a dusting” and you know for sure that a snowy emergency was definitely never declared because there’s still bread on the shelves at the supermarket and, when a storm is threatened, apparently the general public believes that a carbohydrate might be the very thing that can ward off the impending apocalypse?  That’s the environment I found myself in a bunch of years ago on the freezing morning of one of my friend’s engagement parties.